Story Behind The Song

Unlike my usual sharp, structured writing, this song spilled out in raw fragments: directions collapsing, sentences fraying, thoughts stalling mid-air. Only later did I realise the lyrics unconsciously refused every trace of traditional iambic rhythm, the natural meter of neurotypical English speech and instead is mirroring the way my own internal compass had broken under exhaustion. The track moves in cycles, returning to the same emotional bearings, each time dimmer and more frayed, capturing the loop of burnout where you try to find your way forward but keep arriving at the same dark crossroads. It's a song about losing direction, losing language, losing structure... and still having to move through the world anyway. For anyone who's ever hit their own "Dead End" , in neurodivergence, in life, or in winter then this one's for you. (The song's unusual meter and rhythmic divergence weren't intentional. They're simply the way my mind wrote when unmasked, which became part of the story the track tells.)

Song Description

"Dead End" is a winter-bound piano ballad born directly out of autistic burnout: written in the exact moment the world became too loud, too fast, and too heavy to navigate.

Lyrics

(Circum-Sonus Surrounds...)

How can such mesmerising beauty, keep leading me to Hope's End?
Winds of change carry such sweet serenity, that I follow for reasons I can't comprehend.
The fragrance of hope guides the breeze, amidst Rose petals is a trail of Starlight.
My Life's Compass, it is a Core part of me, that I'm Constitutionally unable to fight...

Navigating this life with a broken Compass.
Every road leads me to another impasse.
Forever the fool, believing one day, my life's path will lead to light, A way out...
The flame of time's candle never waits, it's close to burning out...
The roses I follow are but a glamour, they are withered and already at dead's end.
The cycle continues, options are running out.
It's time I accept dead's end...

Envy is a deadly sin, but how does it matter when I'm already dead...?
I can't help my jealousy, bearing witness to life's compass favouring everyone else instead.
It's pointless to ponder, but it's human condition
That for me is harrowing...
Witnessing the rest navigate towards freedom while
My own walls are narrowing...

Navigating this life with a broken Compass.
Every road leads me to another impasse.
Forever the fool, believing one day, my life's path will lead to light, A way out...
The flame of time's candle never waits, it's close to burning out...
The roses I follow are but a glamour, they are withered and already at dead's end.
The cycle continues, options are running out.
It's time I accept dead's end...

Against my will I was born, Bearing a compass core void of its points.
South, the single direction I can go, Life's destination leads only to disappoints...
Even when I try to follow your ways, hoping you'll lead me there.
Magnetic repulsion of me from you, I can't ever get close or know the feeling of someone's care...

Navigating this life with a broken Compass.
Every road leads me to another impasse.
Forever the fool, believing one day, my life's path will lead to light, A way out...
The flame of time's candle never waits, it's close to burning out...
The roses I follow are but a glamour, they are withered and already at dead's end.
The cycle continues, options are running out.
It's time I accept dead's end...

Will the winds blow again carrying rose's that for a moment,
I experience hope...

But in this moment, all I wish if for dead's end because
I can no longer cope...