Chris Mortensen

70

I love to play guitars, shoot guns, and ride horses

Chorus
Take guitars, rifles, and horses
They're three of the icons of the west
Give me guitars, rifles, and horses
They're three of the things that I like best
1st Verse
I love my jumbo Taylor with a brand new set of strings
Tune her up, strum her hard, listen to her sing
With a neck that plays so easy, it almost plays itself
Can't leave her in the case for long
Can't leave her on the shelf
Repeat Chorus
2nd Verse
I love my Browning A bolt, southpaw .270
It shoots real flat, right on the mark, but won't kick back at me
And way out in the desert we have a lot of fun
My little .204 tips over rabbits on the run
Repeat Chorus
Bridge
Slide the rifle in the scabbard, mount up before daylight
Hunt all day, play tunes around the campfire glow at night
Repeat Chorus
3rd Verse
He's shiny and he's sturdy, just shy of 16 hands
He's got a lot of motor, and he covers lots of land
And maybe he just likes me, or maybe it's just luck
It's been at least five years now, since Blaze has tried to buck
Repeat Chorus

78

A nostalgic look at lost youth and approaching geezerhood.

1st Verse
I used to be lean and I used to be strong
I used to fit in and I used to belong
But now I'm the old guy whose hair has turned gray
Sometimes I feel like I'm just in the way
2nd Verse
There was a time when I could compete
In baseball or football, with much quicker feet
Or hit the three pointer at the end of the game
But now I'm too slow, now I'm too lame
Chorus
The older I get, the better I was
But life keeps on movin', I can't even pause
And every day younger looks better because
The older I get, the better I was
Bridge
I used to climb mountains to ski from the top
Now I'm so slow that I speed up to stop
3rd Verse
I think back real fondly on those days of youth
I look in the mirror, it tells me the truth
But it's counterproductive to sit and complain
'Cause a young body comes with an immature brain
repeat chorus

60

A lovesick guy keeps coming back, in spite of how badly he's treated.

1st Verse
First you say you want me, then you act like you don't even care
I keep on chasin' you, but I'm not gettin' nowhere
I'm sayin' all the right things, but you don't seem to hear
Then I try to get closer, but you don't seem to want me near
I try to get your attention, but you don't see
Did I forget to mention, you make a fool outa me
2nd Verse
You think that love is fascinatin', you should be participatin' with me
You keep a lookin' right past what's been right there for you to see
I may not drive a BMW, an Acura, or a Saab
Just my old Ford pickup, but it's paid for, and I've got a job
You think the grass is always greener and you just gotta see
What's on the other side, while you're makin' a fool outa me
3rd Verse
Round and round, up and down, and all about
That's the way you turn me when you turn my heart inside out
I try to straighten you out, but you keep on throwin' me curves
Then you act all innocent, baby, you've got your nerve
The writing's on the wall, I've been unable to see
I must be a fool, 'cause you make such a fool outa me

142

This song describes the euphoric feeling of skiing deep powder, It has been described as "the most fun you can have with your clothes on". I would concur. Unless you are a powder skier, you can't imagine how great of an experience it is.

My favorite way to spend a winter day.

1st Verse
I'm floating down in perfect rhythm
The hoar frost sparkles on the snow
There's not a sound except my breathing
I melt into the white below
Adrenaline just rushes through me
I feel weightless, I feel strong
I'm carving turns between the trees
I'm rising up, I'm sinking down
Chorus
Oh, what can I say, there's nothing like a powder day
My troubles all just go away, there's nothing like a powder day
2nd Verse
We dive into the cirque at Snowbird
We snorkel through the Targhee fluff
The Hobacks stretch out way beneath us
We'll never ever get enough
The helicopter waits below
Three thousand vertical untracked
I never thought I'd make it here
But now I know that I'll be back
repeat chorus

76

This is an irreverent chronicle of a situation we've all seen.

Chorus
Here they come, she's on his arm
Showin' off her attributes, turnin' on the charm
He thinks he'll be happy, but he's messed up his life
All because he had to have that young trophy wife
1st Verse
Boy, was I surprised when they showed up at my door
He had a brand new twenty two, but he'd lost his forty four
Now, I'm not talkin' firearms, no one would make that trade
But she was quite the looker, yeah, she was quite a babe
2nd Verse
She had these two long legs that went way down to the ground
And she just flashed a smile, then she slowly turned around
And I could tell he thought he'd scored one hell of a deal
But it was plain for all to see, some parts of her weren't real
repeat chorus
Bridge
Now his ex-wife hates him, and his kids hate him too
And every month that alimony check comes due
3rd Verse
She's younger than his daughter, he doesn't seem to mind
She's dippin' in his wallet, he's gettin' way behind
She's ruined all his credit, and there'll be hell to pay
He's sacrificed tomorrow for a good time today
repeat chorus

58

A lot of people worry more about finding the perfect mate than trying to be one.

I was drivin' down the highway, just the other day
I had a little talk with my son
He said "Dad, when you and my mama weredating
How did you know she was the one?
And how did you manage to stay together
Through all these years, what's the key?"
I said, "Son, we just try to be good to each other
I think by now she's gotten used to me
He said, "How will I know when I've found the right woman
I don't want to make a mistake
And how will I know if she's one I should pass on
'Cause I'll live with the choice that I make,"
I said, "Son, there's a whole lot of things I could tell you
I'll make this as clear as I can
You won't have a doubt when you find the right woman
Just make sure that you're the right man
Be true to yourself and say what you mean
Make sure you mean what you say
And try hard to be just the man she thinks you are
And tell her that you love her every day."
I said, "Son, there's a whole lot of things I could tell you
I'll make this as clear as I can
You won't have a doubt when you find the right woman
Just make sure that you're the right man

43

This song's about a man who tells his wife/lover that she should be satisfied with who he is, it's hard enough being who she thinks he is, let alone who she thinks he ought to be.

I have a friend who could never do anything good enough for his wife. She was always super critical, so he just quit trying. I think there are a lot of men in this situation, fortunately, I'm not one of them.

1st Verse
You were always lookin' for someone to love, someone to share your hopes and dreams
I was hopin' I could make all your dreams come true
But lately it's been lookin' like some of those dreams will never be realities
I've done most everything a man could do
Chorus
Darlin' I've tried to be the kind of man that you think I am
It's so hard to be the man you want me to be
Darlin' I've tried to keep you satisfied
You can satisfy yourself if you just settle for me
2nd Verse
We've traveled life's highway for many a mile
Sometimes the road's a little bit rough
Together there aren't too many things we haven't done
So forget about the hard times and put on a smile
And if that road ain't smooth enough
Remember there's still many a mile to come
Repeat Chorus
Bridge
Well I've tried and I've tried to keep it all inside
I've got to let you know how I feel
Tomorrow I'll try all over again
Just to show you this love is real
Repeat Chorus
Tag
Settle for me, 'cause darlin' I've tried
You know I've never cheated, you know I've never lied
I was always standin' there right by your side

44

A philosophical look at love and the future

1st Verse
I can't describe the feeling whenever you are near
To hold you close beside me makes time just disappear
But time goes by so slowly every minute that you're gone
The days can be so empty, the nights can be so long
Chorus
And I wonder if you ever wonder about me
And as you lie there in your dreams, am I the one you see
Or will you find some day that I'm a faded memory
I wonder if you ever wonder about me
2nd Verse
I look into the future, I see your deep green eyes
With time they've held their beauty, as kind as they are wise
I wish your eyes could tell me if you'll still need me then
I'd go to sleep beside you, the luckiest of men
Repeat Chorus
Bridge
I love spending my days and my nights with you
You wake from your nightmare, I hold onto you
Repeat Chorus