Song Description

silly comedy country song about a guy who has a dull life, but thinks he'll get famous if he eats enough

Lyrics

Verse1:
Few months ago I got to thinkin',
My life's a terrible mess
I spent the whole mornin' drinkin
By three I still wasn't dressed
So I put on my old blue jeans,
Splashed some cold water on my face
Grabbed the keys to my truck and I headed
Out of this old place.

Verse2:
You see the ladies used to ignore me
And the fellas all called me Slim
Passin' kids would ask their mommas
Hey Momma, what's the matter with him?
Well, I've made up my mind
I've decided right where it's at
I'm gonna spend my life like Elvis
By a-gettin' fat.

Verse3:
You know it didn't take me too long
Til the scale said two hundred and four
Now the checkout girls all know me
Whenever I go to the store.
Well I never would have thought it
Now I got 'em waitin' in line
To ring up my donuts and bagels
Over in aisle nine.

Verse4:
Now I like ice cream
And I like popcorn
Said I like candy bars
Yeah, they're the reason I was born
When I get to feelin' hungry
There's no better thing will do
I load up my cart with snack food
Just for me and you.

Verse5:
That's the end of my story
It's not very sad, but it's true
You don't have to spend your life searchin'
Cryin' and a-singin' the blues.
Well, I may not be an athlete
But I've got somethin' better than you
I got a girlfriend who gives me a discount
On all my food.