Song Description

A song done in a march-type rhythm with a modern-rock feel. Vocals are an excerpt of adult self-analysis after an incestous childhood. Poses the question, why do we keep reliving that which we fear?

Lyrics

Love and sex can feel something like pain.
I?ve been cut to the bone and completely shamed.
I never saw forever ?cause beauty is free,
and I?m learning to see it can be deeper for me.
I?m esthetically confused as I face my dilemma tree.
The leaves are falling down because they?re not what they seem to be.

Yet still I?m tempted by a vision of art.
So enchanting, this cheap romance is
a proud disease which stalks in the dark.
Smoke and mirrors, it couldn?t be clearer.

Did you take my innocence you brutal man?
Did you rip apart my soul while you were holding my hand?
Did you watch in silence as I realized,
The truth and what I?ve done and that you were the one?
I won?t stop to ask why the rain is gray
when I?m sure it?s only ashes blowing free of the flame.

So if you can?t respect me know whatever I?ve done
I?ve done with the intention of securing love
and when I said that I wanted you I meant like a doll,
locked inside my mind and unable to harm.
There?s much to be said for getting more than you bargained for.
I?m thinking of all that as I walk out your door.

If I develop morality
can I replace my sense of dignity?
Does it really matter when I cannot see
the point in all of what you say I should be?
If it hurts to give why should I bother?
When it hurts to stand still why shouldn?t I wander?

I fell once again
though I swore last time that I?d never again.
And shouldn?t I give the rest of my life
to feel something more worthwhile?

But when I dare to expose
and you slam the door closed
Don?t you know that I die inside?
Don?t you know that this is why?

I?m still tempted by a vision of art.
So enchanting, this cheap romance is
a proud disease which stalks in the dark.
Smoke and mirrors, it couldn?t be clearer.

It?s only intrigue. Don?t break my apathy.