Story Behind The Song

This came from thinking about how strange it feels when people tell you they're proud of the person you've become while privately you're questioning whether you even want the life you built. I wanted to write about being placed on a pedestal at the exact moment you feel yourself slipping off it.

Song Description

"Slipping Off My Pedestal" blends nocturnal alternative hip-hop with dark melodic pop, pairing a hypnotic, laid-back groove with confessional lyrics about numbness, ambition and identity. The song contrasts the person everyone is proud to see with the person struggling underneath, using fallen-angel imagery and the repeated "I'm falling" hook to capture the pressure of living a life that no longer feels like your own.

Lyrics

You call me angel but I've fallen so hard
demons raging war inside of me fighting for the right of my body
the sick desire to feel numb
I feel it eating at the pit of my stomach
eating at my heart
the only time I feel human is when I'm full of man made euphoria
oh Jesus what have I become
sic transit Gloria
all that glitters isn't gold
but I keep climbing up the ladder in hopes that the closer I get to the top
the happier I will become
I'm slipping off my pedestal, I'm falling

You call me an angel but I've fallen so hard
demons raging war inside of me
fighting for the right of my body

I lie in my bed, my bed of lies feeling nothing but tears in the corners of my eyes
I'm flawed
and I'm basking in the sorrow that lives inside of me
under the façade of what everyone wants me to be
they say I'm so proud of what you've become
but really I'm dying
to get out of this life I built
and become what is my heart
I'm struggling against what society dictates as the American dream
but my dreams are nightmares
waking me up in the dark
my heart
tight in my chest knowing I have to get up and live another day of lies
they say I'm proud of what you've become

I say I'm falling

You call me an angel but I've fallen so hard
demons raging war inside of me
fighting for the right of my body

I don't recognize the face in the mirror but my reflection keeps getting clearer
a sinner and a saint just trying to find redemption

I'm just trying to find redemption