Story Behind The Song

I'm just tellin' it like it is!

Song Description

A man explains to his wife why he keeps fantasizing about a younger woman - and begs her to make their marriage complete and such fantasies unnecessary.

Lyrics

In bed at night I often give contented little hums;
I stretch and creak and snuggle down whenever my hum comes;
You always kick me in the ribs and say, "Be quiet, do!"
But you should worry, for my hum has naught to do with you!

I'm dreaming of a lovely girl that I can hug and hold;
She's twenty-three, her name is Belle, her hair is long and gold.
She never says when in my arms her neck is stiff and sore;
Or that she must go down and fetch the milk from the front door.

When she lies in my arms she doesn't muse about the cat;
And when I leap on her she never says I've squashed her flat.
She never lets our daughter go to school without a wave;
She doesn't think I don't exist from nine o'clock till five.

She knows the money in the bank is there because of me,
And isn't just transferred in there by Providence for free;
And when I say, "Remember when ...", she laughs and sparkles still;
She doesn't say, "Love changes. Shush!" and "Have you paid that bill?"

I'm sorry, dear, if this should seem a bit disloyal to you.
I realize if I had that girl she'd want the bills paid too.
And gazing into someone's eyes is ultimately better
If she exists, belongs to me, and gave birth to my daughter.

If only you would realize this, unfair though it may seem:
A man needs someone all his life who's his romantic dream.
Through all your daily toils for me, with sink and schools and cooker;
All I really want of you is a gently sparkling lover.