Lyrics

Valentine Valentine
My man is such a swine
I can't believe he dropped the ball
This year another time

It's the 14th of February
The world series of love
Does he want to win this game
And catch my heart inside his glove

He didn't bring me jewelry
He didn't bring me flowers
In this championship game
I had to send him to the showers

I needed a grand slam
So I let him get on top
He got the bases loaded
But he was a short stop

On Valentine's Day
To stay on my winning team
Get a clue, I'm keeping score
Don't make me want to scream

Chorus
Don't bring me chocolate
And complain that I'm not thinner
Graveyard flowers
And a two-for-one dinner
Don't beg for me to give it up
And then call me a sinner
You're out of here, game over
This girl deserves a winner

It seems that in the draft
I always pick a loser
A minor league player
Big tobacco chewing boozer

Last year he bought me tickets
To the monster truck pull
Oh yeah, honey, don't stop
You're making me drool

Two hours late for dinner
No perfume made by zee French
He struck out on the diamond
Sent his ass to the bench

With anything to choose
From the many shopping malls
On this most romantic night
I only got his foul balls

Chorus

You men just front
But on this hunt
It's really sex you want
Don't swing too hard
When signals say
It's better just to bunt

If the dugout is where
You've been a full-time tenant
Take some coaching from your woman
And you might just snatch the penant

He said to me, his MVP
Valentine's Day is like a trap
You girls get so aggressive
I gotta put on a jock strap

Hershey's Kisses for the misses
Ain't I even in the ball park
Hey I spent almost five bucks
On this lousy card from Hallmark

Chorus

To get on base bring me lace
Put a big smile on my face
With chocolate hearts and long stem roses
You can win this race

But if you lose, don't blame cupid
It's not his fault you're stupid
Just go back to training camp
You've got all year to recoup it

Chorus

This girl deservers a winner