Story Behind The Song

There's this common held belief that men don't feel pain the same, so, often in divorce, it's automatically assume that a child is better off with the mother. I wrote this tune to shatter that belief. Every memory of my daughter carries with it the memory of the man I was, then, thus making it almost impossible to enter her life, again, without behaving, on some level, like the man I used to be. But, in all honesty, How Can I Tell "You"...??? My friend, Edwin Ramos, Jr., was hired only to engineer the new release, GETHSEMANE HOUR, but ended up collaborating with me on this tune (and he enhanced a few others) to give it a pop feel. I'm so glad he did! I loved getting to just concentrate on the interpretation. That's him in the background, too. Edwin's just worked with Mary J. Blige and is in the studio, now, with Trin-i-tee 5:7 and Tramaine Hawkins. It's the one of the most honest songs I've written or performed. As always, I conceived the tune and Edwin and I laid the tracks in one day. He laid the background vocals on the second day and I did the lead, in my usual one take!, on the third day. It's always my intention to try and capture a performance instead of making each song 'perfect'. This lyric breaks my heart...I'm not even sure my daughter's even been allowed to hear it?!! THIS is my pain and motivation, each time I perform this tune.

Song Description

I wrote this lyric about my relationship with my daughter. Divorced when she was only 6mos old, I wouldn't see her again until she was 11 years old... for only 2 hours. Now 15, I'm still trying to find a way to tell her exactly how it was, back then. Thus, the title: How Can I Tell You?

Lyrics

HOW CAN I TELL YOU?
(Douglas Powell, Edwin Ramos,Jr.)



How can I tell you?

(Soul Moans)

How could I fulfill your wishes?
Being filled only with emptiness inside?
How can I tell you, now,
How I left you, then, to survive?
Everything in me still hurts.
Every memory carries new pain.
Every moment of every touch
Every teardrop still remains?.
Mem?ries that never change.


How can I tell you,
Exactly how it was?
I was so irresponsible, then.
How can I give you,
A story or my Love?
I don?t even know where to begin.


Can I ever make amends?
Is this song all there will ever be?
How can I tell you, now?
How can I make you see?
That everything in me still hurts.
Every memory carries new pain?
Every moment, every touch?
Every teardrop still remains?
Mem?ries that never change.

How can I tell you,
Exactly how it was?
You were so young and innocent, then.
How can I give you,
My story, or my Love?
I don?t even know where to begin.
How can I tell you,
Exactly how it was?
I was so irresponsible, then.
How can I give you,
A story or my Love?
I don?t even know where to begin!

How could I fulfill your wishes,
Being filled only with emptiness inside?
How can I tell you, now,
That I left you then, to survive?

How can I tell you,
Exactly how it was?
How can I give you
My story or my Love
I don?t even know where to begin?
How can I tell you,
Exactly how it was?
How I tell you,
How can I show you,
Oh, oh, oh?.
How can I tell you,
How can I tell you?!!
How can I enter your life again?

(For our daughters)


©1999 - EdenDust Publishing / Edwin Jesus Ramos, Jr. Music (BMI)

Lead Vocals: BD.
Background Vocals: Edwin Ramos

Performed, Produced and Arranged by Edwin Ramos, Jr. for BIGTIME! Entertainment, Inc.
Recorded and Mixed by Edwin Ramos, Jr. at Capricorn One Sound Studios, Bridgeport, CT.
Assistant Engineer: Alicia Recinos