Lyrics

I kept a journal filled with pages upon pages of the words she said.
I used a microphone to document and savor poetry she read.
I often wonder if I ever even had a single chance with her.
Amazing what can be communicated with a single glance at her.

But she's got a boyfriend that I think's real cool.
I hope they ain't caught on that I'm the fool.
Why can't she date an asshole or a big fat dike?
'Cause I can't compete with boyfriends that I like.

Her every gesture, every word, and every utterance inspire me.
I'm certain there is no dimension in which she'd ever desire me.
I'll soon be left a mental case if I remain a loyal friend to her.
But if there's no end to perfection then I swear there is no end to her.

Every time I see her, he is always there.
And I complain to God that it's no fair.
I wish he'd hop the country on his motor-bike,
'Cause I can't compete with boyfriends that I like.

I don't know what makes me think I'd be good for her,
But something deep down inside me wants to be sure.
I wish he'd get stuck without a buck on the Jersey Turnpike,
'Cause I can't compete with boyfriends that I like.